Which "Path" should I take?

Why is it that I continue to go towards a path that I know is off limits? It is with my own doing that this "path" has met its end though I continue to try and force it to continue.... I know that there are somethings in life that we have to do for our own good, though I do not feel as though there was any want in what I had chosen.

I beat myself up every day for the choice that I made, though I know that it was the best choice I could have made at the time for my family... I may sound silly but I just cant seem to cope, maybe because somehow without my doing or searching this "path" seems to want to continue as well. Its ended and done, though can it branch off and take another? Yet again do I want to forget what was? Just to go with the flow and create a new one? I dont think so... I dont think i'll ever forget, If I cant have it the way it was then I dont know if I could handle the new.

I try so very hard to move on but I for some reason seem to be stuck in this limbo of things that wont allow me to continue... everywhere is a reminder of what was...

Why cant I just want to live for what is going to be?

(Im sure this makes absolutly no sense to anyone but myself, but thats ok I needed to get some stuff off my chest withough specifics....)